
My complete boredom at work has forced me to do some extensive Internet research and deep thinking. The Internet research consisted of google image searches of Robert Pattinson and Twilight movie stills. My deep thinking consisted of marveling at how all the Twilight vampires have perfect skin. Now, my roomie Hallie filled me in on the details in the Twilight book - particularly how the vampires are super fast, super strong, super agile, and super beautiful. Also, vampires glitter in the sun. That is why they have to seek cold, grey locales to call home.

Here is the real deep thinking, folks. Vampires are beautiful and have porcelain skin. Vampires have to stay out of the sun. Socrates, or someone else old and Greek, would determine that my observations lead to a statement of logic: vampires have beautiful, porcelain skin BECAUSE they stay out of the sun.
The lesson here, my children? Where your sunscreen. SPF 30, babies.

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