It's the holiday season, and I want to sparkle. I got some teeth whitening strips to brighten my smile. Don't get me wrong - my teeth are already super white and shiny. I just want the teeth of a soap opera star. I don't know about you, but there are precious few moments of the day to get important tasks accomplished. So big deal if I slapped on a whitening strip at work? I could still answer the phone at the front desk, and I made sure I only half smiled at the messengers who came in while I was wearing them so nothing showed. None of my office mates whose names I don't even know ever talk to me. But the ONE TIME I had the upper strip on my top teeth, the account manager I nicknamed "Fast Walker" HAD to walk by and HAD to ask me where the mailing labels were. At first, I didn't answer. Then I just pointed in the direction of the supply closet. He just stood there. He asked again. Then I answered, and he told the boss who then told me I was professional enough to be the face of the company. Have you seen my face? I have a really good face. I have a very welcoming face. It's a face I would want to see when I walked in a stuffy office for parking validation. But I got fired. Again. At least my teeth are whiter.
